Saint Silouan and the Wisdom of a Married Man


Following such interesting discussion of the necessity of monasticism, I offer a small story from the life of St. Silouan of Mt. Athos in which he comments on the spiritual wisdom of his peasant father (a married man). Truly, we are all called to different stations in life, but in every place, those who love God and seek Him, find Him and with God, they find wisdom.

This excerpt is from the Elder Sophrony’s St. Silouan the Athonite.

Young, strong, handsome, and by this time prosperous, too, Simeon [later to become the monk Silouan] revelled in life. He was popular in the village, being good-natured, peaceable and jolly, and the village girls looked on him as a man they would like to marry. He himself was attracted to one of them and, before the question of marriage had been put, what so often happens befell late one summer evening.

Next morning, as they were working together, his father said to him quietly,

‘Where were you last night, son? My heart was troubled for you?’

The mild words sank into Simeon’s soul, and in later life when he recalled his father the Staretz [elder] would say,

‘I have never reached my father’s stature. He was absolutely illiterate – he even used to make mistakes in the Lord’s Prayer which he had learned by listening in church; but he was a man who was gentle and wise.’

They were a large family – father, mother, five sons and two daughters – all living in affection together. The elder boys worked with their father. One Friday they were out harvesting and it was Simeon’s turn to cook the midday meal. Forgetting that it was Friday, he prepared a dish of pork for their lunch, and they all ate of it. Six months later, on a feast-day in winter, Simeon’s father turned to him with a gentle smile and said,

‘Son, do you remember how you gave us pork to eat that day in the fields? It was a Friday. I ate it but, you know, it tasted like carrion.’

‘Whyever didn’t you tell me at the time?’

‘I didn’t want to upset you, son.’

Recalling such incidents from his life at home, the Staretz would add,

‘That is the sort of staretz I would like to have. He never got angry, was always even-tempered and humble. Just think – he waited six months for the right moment to correct me without upsetting me!’

9 Responses to “Saint Silouan and the Wisdom of a Married Man”

  1. fatherstephen Says:

    Here the great saint and holy elder clearly stands in awe of the wisdom of his own father – which he acknowledged was greater than his own. A comment on the wisdom of his father, and on the humility of a saint.

  2. rdreusebios1 Says:

    Fr. Stephen,l
    How amazing! I just began reading Archimandrite Sophrony’s work this morning and was very touched and amazed by this very passage. Thank you for a wonderful response to the concerns of many re: The monasticism Thread!
    Christ Is Risen!

  3. Trevor Says:

    I thought it was weird enough to see this post after reading the passage myself yesterday evening; now I see that rdreusebios1 also started the book yesterday. Spooky!

  4. Alyssa Says:

    Thanks Father! I, too, just started reading this biography in the past two weeks and I love this passage. How great!

    I do wish there were more stories/biographies of the married faithful/saints. If anyone has recommendations, please send them along.

  5. Alyssa Says:

    A bit off topic, but if I can give a shameless plug for Fr. Stephen and this great blog…someone has already nominated GTGFAT as Best Religion Blog and I’m thinking that with over 150,000 hits (as Fr. reported a couple of days ago), that this could easily win…if we go and vote. Mind you, we all know that Fr. Stephen does not care about such worldly things, but it could still be fun!

    So, for the uninitiated, you can go to:
    to vote for our beloved blog.


  6. Theron Says:

    If only I could come that close to a father for my own children.

    There is a book by Dr. David and Mary Ford of St. Tikhon’s Seminary entitled Lives of the Married Saints. I have never read it but its on my list of books to buy.

    God Bless

  7. Fatherstephen Says:

    Excellent suggested reading, Theron. I know the book but couldn’t remember the title.


    How kind.

  8. Barnabas Powell Says:

    Valuable story. It just goes to show that the depth and breadth of the faith will always be bigger than our discussions about the faith.

    Father, thanks for the post.


  9. Margaret Says:

    Lives of the Married Saints is excellent! I have only read a few stories while at the Alektor Cafe and Door to Paradise Bookstore here in Nashville, but the stories have been a blessing and an encouragement to my married state. (My husband has enjoyed it, too.) Now that I am reminded of it, buying it seems the best idea!

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